Tonight while I was taking a bath, I couldn’t help but wonder..... -Pure heart with a dirty mind, Randy Ryder
In the movie Birdbox, seeing as animals aren't affected, guide dogs would be the most valuable animal companion to have over a bird.... Who has seen the movie.... It took the world by storm! -Pure heart with a dirty mind, Randy Ryder
If a kid is born at 1am and flies to a time zone just before midnight and dies, he will be dead the day before he was born -Pure heart with a dirty mind, Randy Ryder
Lobster and steak is surf and turf. Chicken noodle soup is chirp and slurp. -Pure heart with a dirty mind, Randy Ryder
If humans are at the top of the food chain, cannibals are a step above -Pure heart with a dirty mind, Randy Ryder
Male country singers talk about how good they are to women, while female country singers talk about how terrible the men are. -Pure heart with a dirty mind, Randy Ryder
If we all died simultaneously, it would be the most important event in history and no one would even know -Pure heart with a dirty mind, Randy Ryder
If you steal a smartphone with face recognition from a celebrity you could probably unlock it with their wax figure at Madame Tussaud's. -Pure heart with a dirty mind, Randy Ryder
Children must wear seatbelts unless you put 50 of them on a school bus -Pure heart with a dirty mind, Randy Ryder
Since you're clean when you get out of the tub/shower and towel off, you're actually clean so then shouldn't the towel be clean too, but yet you still know it goes in the laundry. Makes you wonder about the the water you bathe in.
George Michael passed away on December 25th 2016 and was a registered organ donor. On his last Christmas, he gave someone his heart. -Pure heart with a dirty mind, Randy Ryder
You need to buy a parking ticket to avoid a parking ticket. -Pure heart with a dirty mind, Randy Ryder
Some people can express their feelings/emotions better when texting than in real life. -Pure heart with a dirty mind, Randy Ryder
There is probably a couple of scam email bots are out there stuck in an endless loop of trying to rip each other off. -Pure heart with a dirty mind, Randy Ryder
Everyone thinks that their dog is the world's best dog and none of them are wrong. -Pure heart with a dirty mind, Randy Ryder
So many people now take Uber when they are drunk. Wonder how many lives Uber has saved. -Pure heart with a dirty mind, Randy Ryder
The difference between cats and dogs is this: If a house cat got to be the size of a golden retriever, no sane person would ever own one. -Pure heart with a dirty mind, Randy Ryder
Asking a polite person to please stop apologising is essentially verbally trapping them -Pure heart with a dirty mind, Randy Ryder
A "wet dream" is your subconscious taking advantage of you through non consent. You have just assaulted yourself. LOL!!! -Pure heart with a dirty mind, Randy Ryder
The only way to truly finish doing laundry is to be naked. -Pure heart with a dirty mind, Randy Ryder
The only way to truly finish doing laundry is to be naked. -Pure heart with a dirty mind, Randy Ryder
When you say forward or back your lips move in that direction..... -Pure heart with a dirty mind, Randy Ryder
Clapping is just hitting yourself because you like something. -Pure heart with a dirty mind, Randy Ryder
